Friday 19 December 2008

A simple pattern you can use to change the world

Today I took a plastic carrier bag with me when I walked round the nature reserve. Why? So I could pick up bits of rubbish - beer cans, bottles, crisp wrappers - that had been bothering me when I walked ("Why do people do it?" I'd say to myself. Then I changed it to "What can I do about it?")

The inspiration for this came from my friend & teacher Bill Cumming (www.oneperson.net), who invited me to find a way to leave every environment better than I found it. I've always been quite an untidy person, but the idea of making each room I went into just a little better before I left it seemed much more manageable than "changing my ways".

Then I drew a connection between this idea & something I learned when I first started studying NLP: leave people better than they were when you found them.

These are simple principles to practice on a daily basis, & will improve the quality of YOUR life (to say nothing of the lives of those you touch).

Imagine if we all practiced these two principles...

You don't have to! Just start doing them, & they will have a viral effect, spreading to others. When you make someone feel good, they pass it on. When you improve a space, others will be inspired to do the same.

And even if they don't, you'll improve your inner space every time you do it!

To your success,

Big love
Jamie

Thursday 18 December 2008

How to Have a Wonderful Holiday – Part 1

In this article (also published today in my NLP tip), you're going to discover some simple mindsets that can connect you with the source of a deep sense of wellbeing you can bring into your day during the holiday season & beyond.

For the past 12 weeks, I've taken part in a weekly conference call as part of Bill Cumming's “What One Person Can Do” programme (www.oneperson.net). Bill's mission is "The well-being of the planet", & he recognises that it starts with the wellbeing of the individual, with the practice of spiritual self-care. The fundamentals of self-care are as follows:

Acknowledge that this moment is precious – be grateful to be alive

Recognise that everything is interconnected, including you – in awe of the miracle you've stumbled into

Realise there's only one thing you can do anything about, & that's how you'll be as you move through the world. Aim to be as clear, present & loving as you can be.

This week we'll be playing with the first element.

Acknowledge that this moment is precious
According to Wikipedia, the average lifespan for a human being on the planet Earth is 66.12 years. I would normally round that off to 66, but given the subject we're discussing, the .12 amounts to 43 days, just over 6 weeks.

Of course, if you live in a country like USA, the UK or Canada, the average goes up to over 75 years, while living in certain parts of Africa drops the average to 40 or below. Either way, let's look at the average:

66.12 years rounds off to...

793.44 months
3450 weeks
24,150 days

“So what?” you may ask.

Well, consider this. Modern geophysicists consider the earth to be 4.5 Billion years old, & I shouldn't be surprised if it continues to exist for some time to come. DNA evidence suggests that Homo Sapiens (the brand of biped we are today) first arrived on the scene 200,000 years ago, while some sort of humans have been on the planet for up to 2.5 million years. Of course, in the old days (a million years ago), the average lifespan was between 20-30 years.

Stop for a moment, & imagine the vast length of time the Earth has been here, & the amount of time humans have been on it. Our lives take only a small span of that time.

And consider the vastness of the universe. Yet here you & I are, at this moment in time (me writing, you reading), out of all of history, at the points in space we occupy.

Isn't that amazing?

I don't know what happens to my consciousness once I die (or where it came from when I was born). The Buddhists say “fortunate you are to be born a human being”. For the time we are alive, we are part of this amazing experiment, this miracle. Imagine that! Most human beings who have ever existed aren't around any more.

But you & I are! Taking all this into account, we're lucky to be alive. What else?

You're able to read this because you live at a time when 80% of the world's population can read.
As late as the 1840s, over 40% of English people signed their wedding certificate with an X because they couldn't write.
Only half the people on the planet have water piped into their home. Of those who don't, 60% of them get water from some sort of improved water supply like a standpipe or protected well, while the other 40% get it from wherever they can.

Be grateful to be alive
My friend Richard Wilkins says it's a good day if he's not dead. Quickly check. Are you alive? Then it's a good day.

People often challenge him and say that's a very low standard for a good day, but he asks the question “What would you rather have – a million pounds, or not be dead?” He explains that people in hospices, who may not even live to see their children's faces this Christmas would have no difficulty recognising what huge value there is in being alive.

I'll finish with a translation of the word Namaste which I got from Bill:

Namaste: I honor the place in you where the entire universe resides.I honor the place in you of love, of light, of truth and of peace. And when you are in that place in you and I am in that place in me, there is only one of us.

Monday 1 December 2008

Instant Financial Security

OK - here's an insight that (if you internalise it) will make you 100% immune to “the credit crunch”, redundancy, & any other economic weather that happens to arise.

During the 80s & 90s, I thought that the key to financial security was pay increases. I worked hard, switched jobs every 2 years & increased my salary. I noticed that the contractors who worked alongside me earned 2 or 3 times what I did, so eventually I went contract & increased my income further. Then I read “Rich Dad Poor Dad”, where I learned that “passive income” was the key to financial security. I created Salad & developed a strong passive income stream.

Have you spotted the pattern yet?

- I'll feel financially secure when I get a bigger salary.
- I'll feel financially secure when I've got a contract income.
- I'll feel financially secure when I develop passive income.

I was trying to get an internal feeling (security) from external factors (salary, bank balance, sales figures etc).

Oops!

As human beings, what we most desire is feelings. Feelings of love, success, fulfilment, peace, joy, happiness, security etc.

We live in a society that trains us to believe that we need to use external things (money, fame, partners, cars, jobs, achievements) in order to access those feelings.

This is a lie.

Looking on the outside for something that exists on the inside is a classic case of looking in the wrong place (this is also the structure of addiction, as it happens).

1) Identify a goal / change / fix you've been believing will make you feel a certain way (Hint: it probably has the structure “I'll feel A when B happens.”)

Here are some examples:

- I'll feel secure when I've got X amount of money in the bank.
- I'll feel successful once I've accomplished X, Y & Z.
- I'll feel peaceful when I change this limiting belief.

The fact that you can even say this (I'll feel A when B happens) means that you have an internal representation of the feeling (A). It also means that you've been conditioned into thinking that you actually need to have the external experience (B) before you can allow yourself to feel it.

Once again, this is a lie!

You are already emotionally complete. You don't need anything in order to feel your feelings.

2) Ask yourself “What would happen if I allowed myself to feel it (A) now?”

People sometimes think that if they allowed themselves to feel their feelings now, they would lose the motivation to change, grow & achieve. But that doesn't seem to be how it works.

Happy, successful entrepreneurs feel successful whether their businesses are prospering or not.

3) Change your criteria for feeling the feelings you want.

Here are some examples:

- I can feel secure now, because I have awareness. There was a time when all I had was awareness, & now look at me!

- I can feel successful now, because I'm alive. Living is the evolutionary gold star.

- I can feel peaceful now, because I can accept myself exactly as I am.

As my friend Michael Neill says...

"Unhappy people want what they want in order to make them happy. Happy people just want what they want."

This is part of why affirmations can be so powerful. When you feel how you'll feel when you've got what you want, it subtly reminds you that you don't need the stuff in order to get the feeling.

Believing that you need ANYTHING in order to feel happy / fulfilled / whole is the epitome of neediness.

Knowing that you are already complete is the epitome of abundance.

By the way, I'd love your comments on this - please give me feedback so I know what you think.

Friday 28 November 2008

Life persists...


I was walking round my local nature reserve this morning, & took some pictures.

While there are some beautiful scenes of nature, there are also various factories, gasometers etc in the vicinity too, so I had to use my cameraphone to tactically shoot round them.

It's a beautiful day today, & I was reminded that for most of human history, we've spent it very connected to nature. This connection to the natural world is literally wound into our DNA.

Then I came across a tree, with grafitti sprayed on it. While I'm used to seeing tags sprayed on buildings & walls (man-made artefacts), this was the first time I could remember seeing it sprayed on a tree, something natural & living.

My first reaction was a kind of minor outrage, which quickly gave way to a strange sense that there was something quite poetic about it. It occurred to me that the tree had probably been around since before the graffiti-artist was born (assuming it wasn't an old-age pensioner with a spray-can), & would probably outlive him or her. That in fact this tag was probably entirely temporary, & didn't bother the tree in the slightest.

As I looked around, I could see that nature was taking it's toll on the man-made stuff in the environment (rusting, crumbling, decaying) while the cycle of nature persisted.

The river keeps flowing, the trees keep growing, the clouds wander by at their own pace. Even the impact of time, weather, gravity & oxidation on the man-made structures are evidence of the natural cycles of birth & death.

The journey continues...

By the way, I'd love your comments on this - please give me feedback so I know what you think.

Thursday 27 November 2008

Feel what you'll feel...

There are a few practices that I'm doing on a daily basis to keep me in good mental shape & help me live beyond the script:

1) Spending some time each morning & each evening "feeling how I'll feel" when I'm living in the sunlight of the spirit.

Feeling how you'll feel when you've got what you want is a powerful way of getting yourself comfortable with having it. Why? Because people like what's familiar. Comfort zones relate to how we are FEELING. When you get comfortable with feeling how you'll feel when you've got what you want, you massively reduce the impact of your "comfort zone sensors".

2) Practicing gratitude for absolutely everything, whether "good" or "bad".

The reality is that everything that has happened in my life so far has been part of getting me to where I am now. So it follows that wherever I get to in future will be the net effect of everything that happens along the way. I assume that where I go in future will be great, so I can thank everything along the way, as it's helping me to get there in some way.

There's another, slightly more subtle motive too. The more grateful I feel for the wonderful stuff in my life, the more comfortable I'll be having great stuff to feel grateful for. It's those comfort zones again.

3) Going for walks in the nature reserve near where I live.

For many years, I went for a walk nearly every day. For the last couple of years, I stopped doing it (I'd moved into the city & it wasn't as easy & bla bla bla). In fact, there's a nature reserve less than half a mile away from where I live. When I go for a walk, it does wonderful things for my mind, body & spirit.

I'd even go so far as to say that walking is an essential part of me consciously making changes in my life. It's what my friend Bill Cummings describes as "Spiritual Self-care". When I walk regularly, out in nature (rather than just along a city street), wonderful things happen in my life. And yet, I stopped for a couple of years (probably due to some fear of change).

By the way, please post your comments, because I'd love to get your feedback on this.

Your Inner Diamond Revealed



I explored the diamond metaphor more deeply with a group of men earlier this year, but the concepts apply equally to men & women. This all connects to one of my favourite quotes of all time, by the wonderful Marianne Williamson (often misattributed to Nelson Mandela)...

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

By the way, please post your comments, because I'd love to get your feedback on this.

Sunday 23 November 2008

Download Antivirus Software for Your Mind

Did you know that you can download antivirus software for your mind? Here goes...

If you could choose between, on the one hand, feeling positive, resourceful, happy & optimistic...

Or on the other hand feeling negative, unresourceful, unhappy & pessimistic, which would you choose?

This is not a trick question!

If you're like most people, you would choose to feel positive, resourceful, happy & optimistic. So if you're feeling negative, who's choosing that? After all, we've already established that YOU would choose to feel positive & happy.

If you're feeling negative, you're not choosing. And if you're not choosing, who is?

The Script!

The Script is a collection of mental & emotional habits that’s been built up over centuries, & that you’ve been learning since before you can remember. The Script is a story about you: who you are, what you’re capable of, about your world, and your place in it. The Script has been developed by well-meaning people. It’s been passed on from generation to generation, & added to along the way.

Here's a metaphor: Imagine a brilliant diamond, sparkling with light. That diamond is then covered with a thick layer of horse dung. Finally, the ball of horse dung is painted with a veneer of bright red nail polish.

The Diamond is your authentic self, who you really are.
The Horse Dung is your Script, who you fear you are.
The Nail Polish is your social personality, who you pretend to be.

From an NLP perspective, we would say that every behaviour is purposeful. The purpose of the Script is typically to keep us safe in some way, or achieve some other valued result (being paid attention to, feeling important etc). But the price is often our general sense of wellbeing.

So can you change the Script? Yes. In fact many NLP tools are designed to do just that. But more important than changing the script is the simple recognition that the script is NOT YOU!

You are not the script!

So here's the antivirus bit: Any time you're feeling anything other than positive, resourceful & happy, just ask yourself “Would I choose this?”. If the answer is no, then you're “in your Script”. Just take a moment to remember that the Script is not you – you are not your Script.

On a cloudy day, the sky is actually blue - there are just some clouds in the way that make it hard to see, but it's still blue.

When you're feeling negative, you're actually a perfect, resourceful, amazing human being – there's just a Script in the way that makes it hard to see, but you're still that amazing human being.

As you keep noticing that you are not your Script, your awareness changes, & the real you will emerge more & more fully.

By the way, the idea of "The Script" & "Antivirus for your mind" as used in this context come from my friend Richard Wilkins. You can learn more about Richard & the work he & his partner Liz Ivory do at http://www.theministryofinspiration.com/

By the way, please post your comments, because I'd love to get your feedback on this.